The 30 miracles of ginjirou, King of Kings

by Spleen

- THIS JUST IN - 6/11/03-

Nija has stumbled across an Asian chick (friend of a friend) who recognizes most of the faces ginjirou (King of Kings!) makes. Over the years I have gotten all kinds of emails and smart-ass cocksuckers in IRC telling me I got one wrong and to change it, I never bothered because I always liked the original impressions that Ely and I got on that first day. It's like the original japfacing text (now world renowned). We understand far most of the technology now, but I never updated anything because it is fun to read it as it was, many years ago when there really wasn't a place in online gaming that had any sort of mix of American and Japanese players. They accomplished this feat by throwing a shitload of Americans too stupid to understand the servers are in different regions of the world, so they flooded the servers made for Japaese players unknowingly with the lowest American common denominator. The rest is history.

Anyway, much thanks to kab00m from invictus for updating most, if not all of these. Some of them have text with them, in japanese (or korean?) which probably helps explain the faces by either giving them a name, or the sound. This made them even more confusing for us, but makes it quite clear for her. I will add her explanations in red below the original text.

I'm not really sure how to start this, or end it for that matter. The pictures contained here are the most wonderful thing I have ever seen in UO. It was the most amazing and unforgettable gaming experience ever. I have had these pictures secreted away on my hard drive for months now, looking at them every now and then in remembrance. It is time to share.

It all started from hottie spotting. Ely and I had been going from town to town all night chasing down hot jap chicks and giving them pies, cookies, gold, whatever. Sometimes they hang around and talk to us, and that is all the payment we need. In Delucia, I spotted this hottie Alfery. Hot though she was, the reason I told Ely on IRC to come immediately was because of her guild title. [Fanble or Clitical, EXE] Ely came, and we talked with her for awhile. I asked her "are you clitical?" and she replies "or fanble" ... what that means, I have no idea. Underneath her paperdoll was some guy sitting in front of a box. He wasn't talking, he wasnt moving, he was just staring at the box, picking it up every now and then. I looked at his paperdoll, and he was very normal. Nothing flashy, like most japs lean towards. He had on a mage robe, red boots, and that's all. Obviously soft spoken. Also, unlike ALL oriental players, he obviously didn't care about his title. He was something unimportant like Admirable or Proper. Japs can't STAND not being Glorious Lords, take it from me. I noticed his name and guild title was ginjirou [King of Kings, ^.^] I remember thinking it was a bit odd that someone outspoken enough to call himself King of Kings wouldn't care about fame or karma. I also thought it was odd his guild abbreviation was a smiling face. A buddy of his on horseback came up and they started talking. We ignored all of this as Ely and I pressed Alfery for funny stuff. Then, in the middle of the other conversation, we see THIS!

At the time, in IRC, we were both like "whoa that guy makes backwards swastikas!!" and didn't think anything more than that. I noticed the face on the left side, but didn't think much of it. I remember Ely in IRC saying "lets get that guy to make more swastikas!!"

(1) Looking back now, I see the complex GRAPHIC he drew here. The left is a face alright, but below it is a BODY. His emote is obviously throwing chinese stars, and is the first ever to contain a body! In a l33t action stance, no less. Closer examination shows the increasing width of the chinese stars "motion lines" as well as the throwers arm, which bends up from the right of the face.

X

We both said things like "COOL" and "MORE STARS" or some such stuff. It soon became clear he spoke NO english whatsoever. I finally asked Alfery to tell him what we are saying. In the pic above, you can see her saying something, and he starts firing off these crazy emotes!!!

The first one there (2) has two high set eyes, arms reaching up, then two odd humps, with a curly tail looking thing. Could it be a caterpillar? Maybe even MOTHRA?  So many of these faces we will never get even CLOSE to explaining. The second one (3) seems wierd, maybe a robot or something?

(4) This one is simply amazing! At the time, I thought it was just a guy listening to music or something, but later when showing the screenshots to Wheez, he noticed the thing below the face looked like a GUITAR (or similar instrument)!! That HAS to be it!  He has VERY happy looking CLOSED eyes, like he's jamming out! Keep in mind, there was no delay or anything, he just spit it out within a second of being asked!!!

(5) He sits there silent for almost a minute, and alfery is AFK or macroing or something, so I walk up and give him a cake, from my bag of sweets that we had been carrying around for hotties. He IMMEDIATELY fires out this round eyed face!

(6) Once again, he is silent for awhile, so I throw some cookies on a trade window. He eats them, and shoots this wierd face out! There is NO DELAY when he does this. He gets cookies, and types up some complicated face in a second or less.   I have no idea what it is, maybe another robot? Check out the crazy three dot thing, like the targetting laser from Predator. Also of note, the right angles and other odd characters that he typed out with the greatest of ease!! Did this guy have alt-codes memorized or something? Like the three dots, there were tons of wierd symbols I have never seen before, that can only be in his language's code set. He entered them all in SECONDS!

X

(7) We start begging for more, and were sure to reward him when he made a face, so he would understand to KEEP FUCKING GOING!!! We are bowing constantly in the first pic, he gives us some sly looking happy eyes, and immediately busts out this crazy face. A female face maybe? the ='s could be blushes, but what is up with the v?

(8) My guess is it is someone who was beat up? A cartoonish "star" eye and a black eye, with the sweat on the right side, like he is worried? It is either that, or Ace the guitar player for KISS who wore makeup not unlike that! hahaha I doubt ginjirou is a KISS fan, though.

Once again, he goes for another minute or two in total silence. We don't want to bug him in case he is typing up some big complex 4 line emote, so we stay quiet.  Eventually I tell Ely to give him a treat, and we both walk up and hand him something sweet.

(9) As soon he accepts the trade, he fires off this face. Even at the time, I thought it was a girly face. Like two locks of hair or something. Braids? He doesn't stop there. He spits out another complicated emote every time his previous one disappears from the screen.

(10) No fucking idea.

(11) I laughed when I saw this. It obviously looks like some sort of owl. He has his hands in the air, and is obviously excited. I bet the text on the left says "Give a HOOT, Don't POLLUTE!"

(@kab00m) #11 is not owl, but it's a surprised person with arms up in the air

(12) Here he starts getting complicated, and having two faces in one. Clearly a face on the left, but I don't know about the > looking thing, maybe he's looking at a star, or another face entirely?

(@kab00m) #12 has a hand on face, doing a little blow kiss type of thing

(13) Yet another one I'll never understand. The guy is obviously happy, I thought it was odd that the repeated character had a box around it. I bet it is a symbol for money or something, like he won the lottery.

(@kab00m) #13, im not too sure, i've never seen that on side
(@kab00m) if the boxes are on bottom, it's a person sleeping in a blanket

The faces STOP again! We sit there for a minute, and finally just hand him every treat we have left. All our cakes, pies, and cookies. He accepts them, we hear a bunch of munching sounds, and in the blink of an eye another complicated emote appears!!

(14)  Another sweating face, with TT eyes this time. Not sure what the small 3 looking character is for the nose. A beak? Also, it is obvious he went out of his way to have the two sides of the faces different thicknesses. One an AMERICAN character bracket, the other a JAPANESE character parentheses. He switches LANGUAGES when he needs to. The thing on the left is another mystery, looks like a faucet or keg tap to me. Maybe the guy is crying because people are drinking beer from his head. FalloFace?

(@kab00m) #14 is a frustrated person's face, with pointed mouth

Since we piled on all of our treats last time, he SPIEWS FORTH tons of faces. I KNOW I missed pictures of a few of them here. Between the nearby bank spam, and excitedly talking to Ely in IRC, It was hard to even keep them on my journal!

(15) The top one is obviously a guy yelling. He has an open mouth, and circles increasing in size, with a ~ at the end, meaning the sounds keeps going...   Notice he uses a period, a lowercase american letter O, then an american zero, then a japanese upper case O for the largest circle. Amazing.

(16) NO Idea.  The " -t " on the left is very confusing. Also, he intentionally left a space on the left side, to show the head being sort of angled away, instead of straight on. He also seems to be making circles for some reason.

(17) I think this is a peace sign. The guy is obviously happy, and the y looks like a hand doing the gay two fingered PEACE symbol. The " - " attached to the end is once again the sound being extended, like he's saying "peeeeeeeeeaaaaacce".

(18) He started to be quiet again, and play with his wooden box. Since we were out of treats, I ran to the bank and threw him 1000 gold. Before he even accepted the trade he shoots out this face. Not sure what it is, it might be two faces, it might be sideways. The three line character on the right looks like it could be "action lines" like his chinese stars, maybe.

(19) Again, no clue. I think the exclamation mark and the next two chars are actually text, like the face is saying something exciting. "I HAVE U'S STUCK TO MY HEAD!!" maybe.

(@kab00m) #19 U'.'U would be easier to see....

Here Alfery lights up with some retarded face, trying to angle in on the KINGS action. Not sure what it is, or if its supposed to be sideways or what. It ALMOST looks like it is three faces next to eachother, overlapping a little bit, but I wouldn't give her that much credit. He doesn't say anything to her.

 <@kab00m> Alfery's ^^)-o]-_-] means the guy on left is punching guy on right

(20) Doesn't even slow him down. I think he senses competition, and cracks out this breathtaking emote. You're gonna laugh, but I think this one is DARTH VADER!!! See the two slants on either side, like the slant of darths helmet? The X in the middle, because there was a little X on darth's mouth breather thing. The eyes are very machinelike, too. 10 to 1 says that text on the right says "IT IS YOUR DESTINY!!!"!!  Or, it could be an ant. Who knows?

(kab00m) #20 rabbit....

(21) Probably because of Alfery's halfassed attempt at a "triple face" using american characters, he belts out this MONA LISA of emotes which seems to contain FOUR faces, and lines connected them all. Lord of the Dance? Again, no clue. It seems the faces are kind of sideways though if you notice where the eyes are. Maybe they are bugs, or Pac Man ghosts...

(@kab00m) #21 octopus

(Actually I got tons of mail saying the character on the end is the japanese symbol for octopus, but never told you bastards)

X

I wish I could tell what they said here. At the same time he probably said "Howbout you stay quiet now, bitch." as Alfery says "HOLY SHIT I JUST GOT OWNED BY THAT!!" I can't stop bowing in worship, and Ely tells us how he feels.

(22) He spits out this face, which, to me, looks kind of like a bear, as Alfery says some question. Probably "ginjirou, I have shamed my family for 10 generations, you are the king of kings, can I be your servant wife?".

I need to remind everyone that there were only SECONDS between faces. He was either quiet for a minute, as he waited for an OFFERING, or he was shooting out faces every 2 seconds, usually as soon as the previous one dissapeared!

(23) NO IDEA! But I would love to know! It is obviously action-packed! The two circles and the bump REALLY make me wonder what the hell that is on the left... Alfery says "EXE, my guild, has been shamed and tainted by my foolishness, I must take my own life now...".

(@kab00m) #23 i have no idea lol

We spam our approval.

(24) Again, I don't know... But, you know it is SOMETHING, I mean, he went to all that trouble to put the two dots on the left side. Like it is some kinda animal crawling to the right, with a tail. A snail maybe?

(25) AMAZING! This was maybe my favorite. It was the one I was dying to go back and see as soon as it was over. A DANCING GUY!!!!!   There is no mistake, the guy is dancing! I don't know whats up with the mouth, singing maybe? Check out his hands! That motherfucker is dancing! Alfery down there is saying "I cannot bear this any longer, I leave now ginjirou king of kings."

(26) Another AMAZING one, This one is obviously two people sleeping togther. LoveLoveFace!!! Notice his bracket selection! Starts with a { then a [ then a (, and is repeated on the other side. MULTI LAYERED! I think the ['s are the pillows!

Here he is whipping them out so fast the previous ones are still on the screen! That means he was typing them FASTER than one per second!!! That is how fast he was when he didnt have to use wierd characters, because both of these are standard chars, except for the ~'s, which I don't think we can make.

(27) Something is wrong with the guys nose, AND HE IS DISTURBED BY THIS! Really, I have no idea...

(28) This one made  HISTORY!!! Look at the SUPER ANGRY JAP FACE!!! This is where Ely and I got it. He made sure to do some faces in characters we could use, and reproduce by ourselves. Every time Ely kicks a turk in IRC it is for the GLORY OF GINJIROU, KING OF KINGS!!!!

He quiets back down, but I was long out of treats. I asked if Ely had any left, and he hands me one. Then Ely shows his love. If he could kneel, I'm sure he would have now.

We both give him a tasty treat, we hear some munching sounds, then WHAM!

(29) I streak off to the bank to get gold, but as soon as I take 4 steps, he busts out another complicated face. This is within SECONDS of him getting our treats!!! This is another complicated one we need to study more. Its obviously two people. I wonder what the P is doing out by itself, and why both have an M on the right...

(30) His friend comes up with a white horse following him, transfers it to ginjirou, who hops on it, says goodbye, and dissapears in a puff of smoke.   All of them recall within seconds of his saying goodbye. Again, he sticks to american characters for us, with the ~~ at the end depicting action, or waving. In the blink of an eye, the King of Kings is gone.

X

We both sat there for a long time, quiet... Not even talking in IRC, just sitting there in awe...

We share his bench. This bench near Delucia bank is now SACRED! We visit it every now and then... Notice the capital H in "His", because He IS the King of Kings!!

We sat there for a couple of minutes, then we both just closed UO and timed out right there... It had turned our worlds UPSIDE DOWN, this magical man who BLEW AWAY any other complicated emote we had ever seen or invented, with one quick swipe of his magical hand. Noone makes fun of ginjirou, King of Kings. He is sacred. Punishment for such acts is swift and severe.

Click here for GINJIROU-CAM!!! If the owo.com site is working, you can get an up-to-date look at ginjirou himself, on his own stone "Only Gin".