Dark Lord, The Second Age

Dark Lord : The Second Age

by Spleen

WARNING : There are like a million pics on this page, and most of it won't be that funny unless you're an old fan of Dark Lord. I was only going to put up 4 or so, but Lomax and Ezrem wanted em all, so enjoy the long load...

I'm sure some of you remember Dark Lord, he was everyone's favorite newbie from my old UO pics site, and I know at least 5 people who have/had this as their windows desktop, here's the old pic, let the memories roll! Notice his SERIOUS capitalization problems, then and now...

Previously unreleased pics of our first meeting!!! Here is the argument that started it all.

Right before I left catskills for hokuto, I had another run-in with Dark Lord. This was probably 3 months after I first saw him, oh how things have changed.

As you can see, hes MEANER, TOUGHER, MORE EVIL, and, of course, Upstanding! Also, he's joined a TOUGH NEWBIE GUILD (GOD I love those) named "Knights Of Fame And Fortune", making his guildtitle Dark Lord [Reaper of Vengeance, KFF]. So in his spare time now, he uhhh... reaps vengeance I guess. And he must sell it by the barrel, because MEAN is one thing he STILL IS.

Here in these pics, you can see, he HIDES when he sees me, I suppose he doesnt want to talk to me...

Then, a fully armed and equipped Dark Lord unhides, prepared to do battle, or at least talk about doing battle. What I love about this is, I start fucking with him, he hides, and UNHIDES WITH HIS MEAN, FEAR-INSPIRING, STOREBOUGHT PLATE equipped. I think this is supposed to instill fear? All it instills is laughter, as I congratulate him on his outfit.

He doesnt stop there! He's thinking "OK If plate/bone armor wont scare this guy into leaving my DEADLY ass alone, full mismatched plate surely will! He changes his outfit, but I'm still not scared.

Here I ask him if he remembers me. He has an interesting answer...

Q : Do you remember who I am?

A : IF I KNEW WHO U WHERE I WOULD BUT I DON'T KNOW WHO THE HELL U R

I don't think he answered my question, or maybe he did, who knows...

It was about 4 months before, when I took the first pic, he wanted to kill me, so we went outside of town, and I killed him with the quickness. Oh yes, his memory jogged, he tells me there's only one person in the "whole game" he wants to kill, guess who it turns out to be?

I let my intentions be known, not satisfied with killing him in 3 swings and 2 spells like last time, I want a REMATCH.

After noticing how fucking RETARDED he seems to be, I say "You sure can't fucking write, are you sure you can read?" and he has this witty reply for me. "NO SHIT, I CAN REED" LOL!

I figure he will NOT fight me, so I do what I already know he hates, MAKE THE MEAN POINTY ARROWS at him! He runs all the hell over brit bank trying to avoid the unflinching, unyeilding arrows that label him hilarious things like "50 magery newbie", "got killed by my pack llama", "has a butt fetish for Mel Gibson"... Finally, after enough arrows, he says hes going to kill me, but, of course, he "HAS TO SELL SOME STUFF FIRST K?" I let him know when he can sell his stuff.

Here is our hero, Dark Lord, doing exciting things like BUYING REGS! He's preparing to do battle like the REAPER OF VENGEANCE he really is. The left pic, shows his new pet summoned gator that I gave him, named "ImAFuckingRetardedNewbie", that follows him wherever he goes. Loyal as hell, that gator. He hits provis, to sell his stuff to the "vender". Once again, his capitalization problem strikes again, must EVERY word be capitalized? I Wonder What His Middle School Book Reports Look Like? Sadly though, after selling his "loot" which im sure he picked up off the floor of the bank, he ran as fast as the wind, to an Inn, and instalogged. Maybe I will see him again... I certainly hope so... WE LOVE YOU DARK LORD!