The Adventures of Gambl0r, Man Hunter

by Spleen

Yesterday, I was downstairs cookin burgers and talkin to Wheez, when I get a frantic phone call from Mammy Nun. He tells me he started shit with some retarded Catskills tuffguy guild, and that they are so pissed at him, they are all attacking him blue. Four of them vs.one Mammy Nun. I asked why the hell he couldn't get some navy seal bullshit going, and drop them one at a time. His reply is "Spleen, this is catskills, everyone here knows how to fight, you know that. These aren't japs standing around going grey that don't know how to heal themselves!" He requests some Spleen backup, and it's hard to deny it. Wheez and I swing into action immediately. I got on my good char, and Wheezl made a newbie IDENTICAL to Mammys char, Ob'Dewlla X. The reason we do this, every now and then, is so that during a big gangbang, we can sneak an identical char into the mix, get 3 or 4 of the puds to attack, then die on purpose, with only a robe and hat on, thus giving the retards multiple murder hits. The Ob'Dewlla X shown here is Wheezl, with 50 resist/hiding, 100 sass. These pics aren't about the fight, which was hilarious, and I'd kill to have pics of. Mammy and I ran up, killed 3, 1 recalled. 20 seconds later when Wheez ran his fake char up, they were all dead. Had we known they would all die so damn easily, we woulda sent him up first! 90% of the japs I wack on Hokuto fight better than these guys did, go figure. We're sitting around, making fun of them when they get back for having names like Matt [Tank Mage, MeN] when their help arrives.

Edit0rz note : go check out that guilds owo.com page, it's full of tasty newbie goodness. Satin Shadow Reapers??? LOL

Here is their help, Gamblor [Satan's Gambling God, RIP] from tuffguy sister guild Satans Shadow Reapers!!! LOL! Be sure to check out their owo.com page as well. Average Tactics:89 average Age:12.8. Here is where it gets interesting. Gambl0r shows up, obviously distressed that his 25 second response time wasn't fast enough to get to the fight before all his friends died, and he's unhappy. He gets ALOT MORE unhappy when Wheez and I start making fun of his delightful char info sheet. Originally I just took a shot of it for Delusion's Citizens of Britannia page, but then he started talking shit, and wanted a fight. I think this is the "raised by magical deer" guys long lost brother! This pic shows Wheez and I reading over his char info, and making some sassy comments about it. "I find it hard to believe his power got to its peak with a dagger in the woods, unless his power peak is MUCH lower than everyone elses." That comment got him mad. I got a "u think u can take me, bitch?" so of course I respond "I know I can". Gambl0r senses a fight coming on, and doesn't want his trusty steed leaving him during a battle, so he hops off to feed it real quick. HAHAHAHA! Anyone who has played with me knows I applied 500cc's of Halberd to that horse so fast he couldn't even get his bow off fast enough to heal it. Gambl0r isn't gonna take shit from us anymore, between our sassy critique of his char info, Wheez's constant laughter, me whacking his trusty steed (of COURSE named Shadow), he has had all he can take. He attacks me. 4 seconds later, give or take 2 seconds, he's face down in the dirt where he belongs.

I LOVE to do this. When you kill a total dumbass or dickhead, you ALWAYS have to say something that STINGS right when you drop them, and try and get some glorious ghostspam. Gambl0r was too proud to give me any ghost worship though, he was content lying spreadeagle on the ground while I looted him.