Miner Farming!

by Spleen

I have done plenty of truly wicked shit in my UO days, but this one might just take the cake.

I had jumped on my miner, Torgo, for a little bit to mine up just enough ingots to make a few exceptional weapons, and I hit the cave to do a little busy work. In the cave are a couple of miners of the mouthy variety. This is not uncommon at all, however, these guys were chumming it up! They were talking about skills, their lives, movie quotes, etc. I couldn't stand being in there with all the chatroom bullshit, plus, they were making it that much harder to get some ingots. I decided to split, I had a rune marked for a really obscure mining cave in the middle of nowhere. I sometimes go there to get some ingots when I need them.

I thought for a second about just going and stealing the ingots. With multiple miners, you actually make more ingots per hour than mining. But then, I had an idea. No, an epiphany.

I went back to the cave and asked this friendly bunch if they wanted to go to my super duper secret mining spot. There was a little rumble about thieves, but I assured them it was in the middle of nowhere, where thieves can't find them.

I gate them over and get them started. They love it! Plenty of spots to mine, lots of different colors (which I dug up and displayed for them). Like busy little worker bees, they start mining away and cranking out ingots.

I am doing everything I can to help the ingot production process go smoothly. I wasn't kidding about holding their ingots for them. I wanted them to make as many as they could with speed and efficiency! If you haven't figured out what I am up to by now, you don't know me very well.

X

One of them announces that his miner buddy just logged in, and wants a piece of this awesome super duper double-dog secret mining spot. I offer to go to town and pick him up. The more, the merrier!

Eventually I get an efficient production line of miners working like busy little ants. Mining, smelting, mining, smelting. I was dragging their ore around for them on horses. Every now and then I would take off to the "far away" spots where Valorite is found. (Valorite is actually right here, but none of them have high enough mining to know that). One of  them asked for a ride to town so he could bank all his ingots. They had been mining for at least an hour by this point, and I figure they are just about ripe ...

Uh oh!!!

X

I strike with military precision. Paralyzing some of them before they even know what is going on. Suddenly, in the middle of a great conversation about mining skill (probably already been covered about 40 times in the last hour alone) a PK shows up and starts nailing them! None of them even managed to take a step. The nightmare was all over about 30 seconds after it had begun... I looted their clothes, I looted their ingots, but oddly enough (and those of you who have killed with me, or been killed by me know this is not the norm)

At the last minute, I realized a way to skin this animal more than once... I didn't loot their shovels!

Torgo shows back up after just missing the action. Two of them had already picked up their shovels and gone right back to work!

X

But you all still have shovels! Get back to work!

This is when you know you have done good work.

X

I certainly hope not. You are making his halberds!

X

"You got PKed? How terrible!"

Now how about you get back to work, my busy little miner bees. Strong of will, they bounce right back in the face of adversity! I make sure they all have whatever equipment they need to get back to work for me. I don't want any delays in production...

X

You know me, I do anything I can to help. I am just a nice guy like that.

Solidarity, brothers!!!

Check out this fantastic typo! I couldn't make this picture big enough, that is how much I love it. He was trying to bolster the depleted morale of my ingot making slave workforce. "You can take away our lives! But you CAN take away our freedom!"

Preach on, Newbie! Preach on!