Intimate Moment : with Nickodumbass

by Spleen

Nickodumbass. I'm sure you all remember him as a #japan reject that PharismoD pulled out of his ass. He later earned fame as one of the dumbest SOB's to ever query me. I remember when he died in Deciet 1 to a SHADE with his boat key, a rune to his boat, his house key, and a rune to his house on him. He begged for me to pick him up, and finally I said I would gate him out. He keeps begging various people for awhile, then quits IRC. Later he showed up pissed that noone cared enough to help him. I felt bad, because I tried to help him. I felt bad that I spent SIX SECONDS of my life thinking about helping that dipshit. He deserves to lose his house and boat, yes, but for losing ALL that, in a DUNGEON, to a SHADE, is droolcup material. He deserves to lose his account for that. I'd like to page a GM and tell them that "some stupid fuck lost keys and runes to everything he owns in a dungeon, can you permaban him please?" GM_Assduck tells Spleen : Sure, he sounds retarded. Later, after I had whacked him once or twice in game and made him miserable in IRC, he GMed magery. He queries me with a paste from his UOA window, and says "EET THAT". He's fucking brilliant, take my word for it.

So naturally, I was excited to see him in game for the first time in months. He had recalled in to Vesper to buy regs, while Wheez, Justarius, Dev and I were hanging out there. "did someone order a newbie?" He goes "hehehehehehe" in BRIGHT PINK GAY TEXT. What does he do then when he sees its his Arch-Enemy Spleen? He nails me with an energy field on the fourth try!! That's domination, baby!

X

We all jump in front of it like its a mystical urinal. That's Wheezl in the drobe, he's using a disguise kit. Dev in the healer robe and Justarius in the deerhat. Just and Wheez and I run into the reg shop and pester him, making fun of him. He says "fine, ill kill u both" and gates to his house.

We go through, Wheez and I go grey. He attacks Wheez, and wheez splits. He attacks me and I split. We then come back at the same time and give him a big taste of dirt in about 2 seconds flat. He's a dex fag, and lived just long enough to hit me three times with a kryss! That's about two seconds. So much for taking us both on...

He resses nearby somehow, and comes back crying about how thats only one of his many chars, and something about PharismoD's account. I'm not sure what he was talking about, but apparently one of his chars is on Phars account. We were talking about what shitty loot he had, being a dex fag and all, when I noticed he had ALOT of potions. Not only were there 38 in his main pack, he had a pouch with 36 more. Wheez and Just both took plenty of potions from his corpse, so his total was easily over 80. How did he plan on looting anyone when his pack is constantly at about 100 items? Thats just it : HE DIDN'T! He must dirtnap constantly.

HE IS ALL ABOUT PVP!

He puts on his newbied robe, newbied chaos shield, and newbied dagger, so he doesn't look like the freshly ressed newbie that he is, and runs up to his house for safety. His house was empty except for one secure box, so it's not like rushing and looting was an option. It's then that Wheez notices his homosexual char info.

He's so fucking witty. Wheez says "tuff char info, on a tuff guy". He answers with a "hehehehehe".

Right about then he logs on his other tuff mage char, apparently on another account, and gets ready to right the wrong. Spleen is GOING DOWN!!

He hits me with a magic arrow, and I have no reflect. Then he hits me with a Para, about to bust a bunch of spells on me no doubt, but he gets stuck on his porch steps because I threw my reflect earrings on for half a second. Frozen in his doorway, he once again dies in seconds as Wheez and I both nail him with 2 spells. He was all about shooting spells at me from his doorway, and closing the door for safety. Unfortunately for Nickodumbass, Wheez and I are trained and equipped to deal with "porchfag" gayety, and he naps the big nap. Much better loot this time, too. VERY THX!!!LOOT^^

THE PORCHNAP